The Abridged Script
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Movie:
July 14, 1998
Oct 20, 2016 Actually make that Matt couldn't help but cry; Ben still maintains that he was merely misty-eyed. The two have since done many interviews on the magic of being on set, and a few gems have come out. Sep 11, 2003 If the script of Matt & Ben also dropped from the ceiling, as it well might have, why couldn’t it, like the Good Will Hunting script in the play, have its. Jul 31, 2019 Batman is returning to the big screen in 2021 with director Matt Reeves and actor. League,” Ben Affleck was set to reprise the. Batman script was finished and not exactly beloved. 'Matt: This is an excellent script. This is the best script I've ever read. If Ben put this here as a joke, if Ben wrote this, then I have severely underestimated his talents. Ben: Hey, hey check this out! (Ben chugs an entire bottle of Veryfine apple juice.) One motherf.cking sip! Matt: Okay, Ben did not write this.'
Jul 22, 2019 Matt Damon leaves Ben Affleck‘s place after hanging out on Sunday (July 21) in the Los Angeles area. The 48-year-old actor appeared to be holding papers that looks a lot like a script!
The Editing Room
https://the-editing-room.com/s#pnnzk
FADE IN:
EXT. SCHOOLYARD - DAY
BEN STILLER and his gang of HUMOROUS LOSER FRIENDS stand around outside of the school, emitting nerd rays. Suddenly, CAMERON DIAZ rides by on a bike. BEN sees her.
BEN STILLER
I think I'm in love. On a completely superficial level, of course. Luckily, I'm the main character so you have to want me to get her in the end.
Os x tiger upgrade. CAMERON DIAZ
Hey. I want a nerd to go to the prom with. Also, I like beer, sports, ugly guys, braces, bad hair, and all other things that would make me the object of any guy's affection.
BEN STILLER
Hooray!
BEN STILLER proceeds to ejaculate.
INT. CAMERON DIAZ'S HOUSE - DAY
BEN STILLER
I'm here to pick up Mary.
Her STEPFATHER comes to the door. He is black and has an AFRO, which is FUNNY.
BEN STILLER
I have to use the bathroom.
BEN STILLER proceeds to ejaculate on a pile of boogers.
ADOLESCENT BOYS IN AUDIENCE
(masturbating)
THIS IS THE BEST MOVIE EVER!!!!
INT. BATHROOM - DAY
BEN gets his PENIS caught in his zipper. He screams in agony.
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MOVIE TRAILER
This is the funniest part of the movie and I gave it away. Suckers.
BEN STILLER proceeds to ejaculate on the MOVIE TRAILER.
INT. DETECTIVE AGENCY - YEARS LATER - DAY
BEN STILLER
Find Mary.
MATT DILLON
Ok.
He finds her. BEN goes down to where she lives and hijinks ensue. BEN STILLER proceeds to ejaculate on a living dog.
INT. MARY'S PLACE - DAY
MATT DILLON
I love Mary.
OTHER LOSER MALE
I love Mary.
BEN STILLER
I love Mary.
BEN STILLER proceeds to ejaculate and CAMERON DIAZ rubs the semen into her hair and all over her body, which is naked.
ADOLESCENT BOYS IN AUDIENCE
(ejaculating)
I LOVE THIS FUCKIN' MOVIE, YO!!
Suddenly, a BIG HANDSOME JOCK walks in.
BIG HANDSOME JOCK
I love Mary.
BEN STILLER
Wow. He's perfect for her. He's everything she wants in a man, and he's attractive. They totally deserve each other.
AUDIENCE
Matt And Ben Play Script
What a unique ending. Despite being the main character, Ben doesn't get the girl - because he doesn't deserve her and is no better than the other losers who think they are in love. A realistic but happy ending for Cameron and the guy who she deserves. It brings a whole new angle of reality to typical romantic comedies. What an intelligent film.
CAMERON DIAZ
No. I love you, Ben.
AUDIENCE
Yay!! Even better! WOO HOO! GO BEN!
FARRELLY BROTHERS
For good measure: Booger, poopie, pee, vagina, panties, semen, menstruation, penis, and fart. We're funny.
The FARRELLY BROTHERS proceed to ejaculate on the AUDIENCE.
Matt And Ben Script Pdf Maker
END